There are many dwelling places in my Father’s house. Otherwise, I would have told you, because I am going away to make ready a place for you. And if I go and make ready a place for you, I will come again and take you to be with me, so that where I am you may be too.
And now we get to it - the how in dealing with a distressed heart. You may be skeptical at this point, because you may be reading this passage as I have for the past thirty years, as a promise of the beautiful mansions in the sky - the heaven to come. And to be honest, that tracks nicely. I have no trouble believing that there are mansions to come, or that heaven is worth the wait.
At the same time, I’m not sure that the thought of the afterlife has had the quieting effect on my distress that Jesus might have been trying to address here. Talking about where I will go when I die brings to mind images of a child in the doctor’s office being offered an ice cream cone after a shot. It is a nice thought, but does little to calm the tears in the moment. I will concede that there have been times when meditating on the joy set before me (Heb 12:2) or setting my mind on things above (Col 3:2) has given me peace to endure whatever hardship was before me. But what if Jesus is referring to something more present?
Here Jesus uses the term my father’s house, which could mean heaven. However, earlier in John, the author uses that same term to refer to the Temple in Jerusalem (2:19-21) and then later as Jesus’ body. Hmmm…take that in for a minute. What if, instead of heaven, Jesus is saying there are many dwelling places in Him. What if he was saying, I am going away physically, so that you and everyone else can dwell in me forever and always? And what if that means right now, where you sit, rather than when you die?
I’m not sure I can adequately explain this with words, but over the past five years of my journey with God, it feels as if He has been taking me to special dwelling places that were perfectly created just for me.
First came the weeping place - the place I found through a Lectio Divina on the story of Jesus coming through the locked door to the frightened disciples after the crucifixion*. In my mind, I clearly saw the image of Jesus sitting and stroking my hair as I laid my head on his lap weeping. This has become a dwelling place I return to over and over when the pain of life overwhelms me yet again. Here I find solace, attunement, understanding, and empathy.
Then there was the dwelling place I received through a safe place exercise, through Healing Care Ministries. It is a beautiful cabin porch in the woods. A crystal lake glistens just a few yards away and I can glimpse it through the gorgeous pines that rise up and circle the cabin. I can feel the warmth of the sun and the crisp morning breeze, all while breathing in the fresh mountain air and listening to the birds singing their praises. And Jesus joins me there to take it all in. We sit and talk. Sometimes I need to put my head on his chest and cry. Other times we sit in companionable silence, just joining in with Creation, letting our hearts connect and lift in praise to the Father together.
Then there is my grandparent’s porch, that place where I felt completely loved and free to be me. He takes me there when I need to feel safe again. We sit on the balcony porch and dangle our feet over the edge, His chest against my back, both of us reaching forward for the iron guard rails keeping us from falling, causing His arms to wrap around me.
Just recently I was invited to a new place through an immersive reading experience of The Blessing of the Children.** I pictured myself waiting in line with the other kids in eager expectation of being blessed by Jesus. After he put his hand on my head and blessed me, the director asked, “where do you want to sit while Jesus blesses the others?” Immediately I knew. I wanted to sit right next to Him. I sat snuggled up next to Him while he did His work. This has become my dwelling anytime I find myself in the seat of helping others heal. In the past, I would do well to picture Jesus beside me during a conversation with someone who was hurting. Yet, I would still feel the burden of needing to have answers, or worse yet, needing to fix someone. (Lord, forgive me. And sincere apologies to anyone I ever “fixed.”)
But this is a new place…a better place…where I am by HIS side while HE does the healing. And the invitation to this place came at just the time I was re-entering into more formalized ministry work, and was so afraid of reverting to my old ways. Jesus was personally tending to that fear by taking me to a new dwelling place. Oh the relief! The joy! He does the heavy lifting, and I just get to be along for the ride. I return to this dwelling place anytime I am leading someone through Immanuel Prayer, teaching a violin lesson, engaging in a conversation with someone who is heavy hearted, or just having tea with a friend. I rarely want to leave this place!
There are more dwellings I wish I could share with you. But hopefully you are getting the idea. My experience has been that Jesus takes me to places where I feel safe, seen, soothed, and secure, Dan Siegel’s 4 S’s of secure attachment. It is through these dwelling places with Jesus where I am forming a secure attachment with the Lord. This is where my troubled heart finds rest.
Now read the passage again, with this these things in mind:
There are many dwelling places in my Father’s house. Otherwise, I would have told you, because I am going away to make ready a place for you. And if I go and make ready a place for you, I will come again and take you to be with me, so that where I am you may be too. (Emphasis my own)
For your consideration:
If you feel open to it, ask this question and wait. Then write down what comes to mind:
"Jesus, could you bring to mind a time when I felt a connection to you or nature or a pet or another person?"
Be descriptive. What do you see, hear, taste, smell, and especially feel?
And just one more…
"Jesus, where were you in that memory?"
And for those looking for more…
*When Jesus Walks Through Doors, Bonus podcast episode, 2020, The Presence Project
** Practice episode included in The Emmanuel Promise, Rev. Summer Joy Gross
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